Learning To Fly...
And loving it!
‘Learning to fly’ by the wonderful Tom Petty is playing as I type this. I’m seated in the garden and I’m a little distracted…not like me at all…ooohhhh something shiny (and it might on this occasion be the sun)…I’m just like Dorey in ‘Finding Nemo’ in human form somedays…Actually now that I think of it, in my college days, when I was meant to be listening to my professor giving in depth analysis about the wonderful writers of our time - Shakespeare, Joyce, and all those legendary scribes…I would most likely be distracted by anything at all going on in the room. Whether it was the person in front of me, watching how they took down their notes or how pretty their handwriting was or maybe even how bad their handwriting was and the curiousity in my mind for them in how would they ever be able to read their notes after the lecture (says me who wasn’t even taking notes myself)…. to watching how people sat, to looking at their body language, to seeing who they sat with, to wondering if they were listening either….the list was endless of ways to watch people and ways to distract myself from what my purpose was in my seat….I’ve spent my life watching people & in fairness, I don’t think it has done me any harm….
My very good friend who always sat beside me in those lectures, a real good pal, she was ever entertained by me, Karen Reilly…might as well name and shame her here…she was indeed the one who said I was just like Dorey, well not completely the same but she said she got great laughter from watching me, watching others…..I still just about scrapped away from that university with a degree in English (just about) but the most ironic part of it all…..I never was a reader so it didn’t really fall into my interest category ( I know, I know…if I'm to be a writer, a really good writer, you’re meant to be a really good reader…but sure I love to break the rules 🥰🙃🤓 (it’s in my rebellious Irish blood ☘️ ) and sure what is it, to be here on the earth, if not to be happy …..I’m a happy non real life reader (don’t tell anyone!) 🤣
Unlike the subject of English, the other subject that I chose to study as part of my degree - Sociology- I just loved it in every form 😍…. In those lectures, the sociology ones, I was eagerly listening and definitely not a Dorey. I was engrossed to learn why people watch people, I was head down scribbling notes and I was obsessed ✍️ …trying in every way to learn what I could about understanding people’s behaviour. It was my dream subject…You can sense I still love this subject. I still love watching people. I still love learning about people. I still love watching myself in the way I act. I still love learning about me. I still love learning about why I love watching people and also learning why people do what people do and I’m sure there are plenty that watch me and have more than a moment of wonderment but that’s what life is all about right? We’re all different & that’s what makes this journey on the planet so interesting. Why be the same when you can just be you 🙏 I just love watching…I love that by having my eyes and my mind open (as wide as the gate down the field if I can)…while watching everything that is going on around me, it keeps me alert to others, it keeps me aware of others and their feelings, so whether it’s people, animals, nature, colours, atmospheres, the list is endless in what I could be watching...Is that distraction or is that interest? That is the question...
Now back to the garden view for a segue back to my first thought….funny that, I think I just got distracted while explaining how I get distracted but there is a thread here….come with me down this winding road of Lou’s thought system….let’s see where we end up…. haha ;)
I decided since the weather is so amazing here in Ireland at the moment, the right place to be typing, editing, thinking, pondering and just soaking up the summer vibes is out in the garden…. out in this blissful heat under a big umbrella might I add, where the lovely little breeze can keep me at perfect temperature. I’m sitting in grans garden…Like everyone, back in the old lockdown chapters, me and gran spent an awful lot of time out here, and as the days and hours of 2020 & 2021 passed by us, I kept adding a few extra little bits to the area like a table and chairs, cushions, fun little animated characters, wind chimes and of course lights…I went light mad but Gran loved it. She actually loved anything I ever offered up as an idea…She was great like that…Gran’s garden was and always has been like a secret garden where the flowers just bloom and instant tranquility exists.
To enter gran’s garden, one must step down into it. Two steps to be specific and it’s in a rectangular shape penned in by an old style wall which straight away brings you back in time and you feel you are somewhere special just for you. This is definitely my happy place and somewhere a lot of lovely memories are triggered.Let’s just say strawberries and ice cream were a regular weekend treat for me and Gran out here.
As I type, it’s 27 degrees in Ireland and the garden is looking magical and feeling it too…I have to be honest with you and tell you I am a little distracted out here as I type this….But it’s the good type of distracted I spoke about at the start of this piece….I’m distracted by a beautiful robin perched on a tree just in front of me…A happy butterfly just swooped by my table, he’s a regular caller…Daisy, my little cavachon friend is flat out at my feet and the sky is oh soooooo blue…not forgetting the buzy bee that tried to say hello to me (I found out yesterday that if a bee moves in your direction, it’s a symbol of productivity so I’ll take that)….Sorry buzzy bee for my little screeching hello to you…Next time I promise i’ll shake your hand, well maybe not shake your hand, but I’ll at least try not so abruptly meet you with my high pitched tone…..The beautiful colour of all the trees keep catching my eye, so many different greens…Gran’s flowers are looking their gorgeous selves...We always used to be amazed at how Gran’s flowers bloomed. Up to say about the age of 105 Gran used to tend to them herself and would be out watering them a few times a day…They were her pride and joy and my god, would her garden be full of so many colours.
After she broke her hip, family would look after them but as we all said, even on the days we forgot about them (as you do), gran’s flowers still bloomed. We use to say, Gran even if you’re not out there minding them, God is definitely minding them for you…..That’s probably where my buzy bee friend is gone too I’m sure….
Nature is in full bloom and how couldn’t I be distracted by it and even distracted by all the wonderful memories this garden holds…This house is probably about two hundred years old so I guess when I think of it like that, there is so much to think about here….Distracted might be the wrong word though..Sometimes the choice of word you use, can tend to lead to a negative tinge and that is certainly not how I feel about the thinky head I have on me out here….You know what they say….it’s all about how you think about something & that if you apply enough self awareness and thought, you can flip any mindset or in this case a choice of word in an instant can turn it all upside down…This would be a good moment for that…..So let’s take the word I just used ‘distracted’ and turn it on its head….Instead let’s say I’m inspired by all these lovely things and memories around me…inspired instead of distracted changes the whole feel of this story…Truth be known I am inspired.…..and how could one not be drawn to all these wonderful aspects of nature bobbing around and how couldn’t I be feeling full of the good stuff thinking of all the good times I’ve had here? My soul is inspired, my head is clear and even though I look like I’m drawn away from my screen, my heart isn’t…See if I had seen all these things in a photo on my screen - like the buzzing bee or even the beautiful flowers, I would have said ‘gosh that’s nice’ but in a fleeting thought, the good feeling would be exactly that, fleeting…completely different to drenching yourself in the atmosphere of nature and allowing nature be nature with the human sitting in the middle observing and being inspired…. and memories being memories and drenching yourself in them as well….
See nature has a very special magic power and that is that, you can just sit yourself down in the middle of it, and if you give yourself a minute or even three…take a few deep breathes and just sit and observe it… your mind will begin to relax. Your heart rate will begin to slow. Your blood pressure will begin drop and your head space will become less clogged up just like mine is now (questionable I know 🤣 but you know what I mean🤣). And instead of being distracted, you will become so chilled and at ease (I am that for sure), you will also feel inspired and rejuvenated by all that is around you and there lies, the power of nature & also moving your mindset. Changing your language around what you are looking at is powerful and in turn I promise you, it will change how it makes you feel in a situation. So yes one might say, “Lou, you look distracted when I see you at your computer screen & not very focused”, and yes even though I do ‘look distracted’, I’m not at all. I now know this is how I process the world & this is how I live my life. I’m not distracted in the sense of not caring, instead my eyes are open wide and bright & the interest I hold in the world around me, inspires my spirit, my soul and my hunger to be me….
The old me might not have had much interest in my english professors thoughts on the Canterbury Tales, but the me who has now gone up and down the road of life quite a few times (making plenty of mistakes along the way), knows better. I am no longer distracted. I am no longer what others expect me to be. I am no longer even what I thought I might have been. Nope instead I am home. I am me. I am happy. I am at peace. I am breathing in and out and I can nearly hear my heart beat in my chest. That’s the kind of solace and serenity I feel within me now. And I wouldn’t exchange it for all the money in the world. I can see my busy bee on the flower beside me too. I can see the clouds move ever so slowly in the sky. My butterflies from Heaven visit me all the time. Just as I typed this sentence…a butterfly just appeared by me and has flown in the front door of Granny’s…And isn’t that the perfect sign to tell me, I’m exactly where I’m meant to be and I’m exactly who I’m meant to be.
I don’t live my life by the clock anymore either. (Of course I look at the time when I’m meant to be somewhere - and if I say or am meant to be somewhere I will be there) but if my time is free and my own, or if I’m with family or my dearly beloved friends, I don’t even consider my timezone or even think about how long have I been sitting with you. I will give you my all because you are my all. My life has become very simple. I’m here for the love, the human connection & the beautiful transaction of holding each other up, encouraging each other & loving each other. I move when I feel like moving now when in the presence of good people. I sit. I listen. I look. I watch for how people treat other people and then I decide if they are my kind of people. I will give everyone my time but I will keep heart for those who reach out with their heart too.
All the same things I did in college eighteen years ago but now I repeat those processes with a deep regard for the grateful state I sit. I, like the butterfly have changed. I have transformed. But I’ve stayed the same too. I’ve learned from what I’ve gone through that life is a learning process. Life is also what you make it too. It’s up to you what mark you leave on people. And that….equally can be good or bad. Joyous or hurtful. Peaceful or conflictual. But for me, hopeful & loving are always the right choice. And I try my best to make them as often as I can. I don’t always get them right but I try. And for me, that is always enough.
So I can beat myself up for being distracted or I can flip that terminology and mindset (which I’ve got much better at), stretch back, breathe out and look up. And you all know me at this stage, that’s exactly what I’m doing and I’ve no intentions of doing anything else from here on out. Why you may ask? Because as Tom Petty said in his song, ‘Learning to Fly’ (my little segue back to the start) ….I love that song, it’s one of my favourites and the lyrics go a bit like this….
“Well, I started out
Down a dirty road
Started out all alone
And the sun went down
As I crossed the hill
And the town lit up
The world got still
I'm learning to fly.”
Tom Petty also said about the writing of this song, that many thought he was speaking of the high’s of drugs in these lyrics, which was not the case. Instead it was a much more hopeful yet realistic philosophy on life. He stated “You can lay down and let the tragedy (of life) overwhelm you, or you can fly above it, and I think that's sort of what I'm trying to say in this song. I don't say that I can fly - I'm learning.” Me too Tom. Me too. I’m learning and I hope there isn’t a day ahead of me that my mind isn’t open and that I don’t take the time to look around and see exactly what and who is around me.
I hope you too have that peace and time out in your life my dear reader and friend. I know things in this world can be very heavy but we have a wonderful resilience and strength built inside us as humans to survive, cope & we can thrive again in time. We can choose to be angry. We can choose to be bitter. We can choose to be hard done by. But we can also choose the opposite. We can choose to be hopeful. We can choose to be kind. We can choose to be stronger. We can choose to learn. If you can just hold on, and allow the sun pass over you, allow the nighttime turn into day, I promise you, with an open heart ( and a gentle inner voice that speaks within your thoughts) you can be at peace with yourself and you will fly again. Just like my butterfly. Just like my bee. Just like my robin. Just like me. We’re all learning to fly and sometimes we just need to take a seat in the garden to realise that all we need is here all around us. Thank you Granny. I feel you. Thank you nature, I see you. Thank you to all who are close to me. You make my heart, you are my life, you are my everything. Thank you to my dear mother, who i’m so lucky to have as a daily inspiration in my life of how to live a good life. She only sees the good. I hope I get that from her too. She is, after all Granny Nancy’s daughter.
Thank you one and all for reading this and I hope you have a lovely few days ahead of you. Take it easy and don’t forget keep looking up ☀️ 🌙 ✨ You just don’t know what you might see or who you might see 💖💖
Until Monday my dear friends….enjoy the sunshine!!!
Love and light always and don’t worry everything will be alright in the end I promise,
Your friend always,
Lou x
Just to mention also my other home where the kettle is always boiling is the Facebook family…I’ll leave the link here & be thrilled to see you if you decide to travel over…I promise once you enter that home, we will never let you go and genuinely it’s like an alternative universe or something….I can’t rightly explain it but something really magically happens when the group comes together and I boil the kettle…Facebook Family, if you are reading this sentence, you might comment below and share your experience of our family over… Here is the link, go on, click it, I dare you : 'Living and Laughing with Lou' Facebook Home
Also to mention, a very good writing friend has released her weekly substack earlier today on a similar topic which I feel you will really enjoy. Her name is Lauren & her most recent trip to Half Moon Bay in California has inspired her in lots of ways (You all know how obsessed I am with things in the sky at this stage 🌙 )….You will enjoy it here 👉 Hi, Lauren Deborah Substack Home
Okeydokey, Substackian family….Until the next letter…Mind yourself and Keep Looking UP! Wahoooooo! xx
A slice of joy right here. Loved reading about the garden and sociology. 🦋🏡⛲️❤️
Thats beautiful Louise well done